Coffee and Dildos

A few days ago at the local chain coffee shop one of the female employees decided to start talking about the huge dildo she had acquired the previous night.  Apparently it is bigger than any cock she has ever handled.

FWIW, this is not the sort of thing that should be discussed loudly at work in front of customers, so she is no longer an employee there.  Now for the next couple of weeks whenever I go to the coffee shop I’ll be trying to figure out who is missing.

In related coffee news, I recently had the opportunity to visit a popular chain of donut bakeries which is for some reason known for serving good coffee.  I do not understand why they are known for this, since their coffee is shit.

Diseases Caused by Masturbation

A young man, not sixteen years old, became addicted to masturbation to so great a degree, that finally, instead of semen there was an emission of blood, which was followed by excessive pain and inflammation of all the genital organs.

Note: I know this is not true because it has never happened to me.